Intimate Partner Violence - Are you a Victim?
You may already have read of the trending gist on social media. The beautiful, South-African Girl - Karabo Makoena who was killed and burnt by her boyfriend.
Thats in the news, someone we may not know physically. However, this phenomenon is actually so common that almost everyone may know a lady (or man, though this is far less common) who has been beaten black and blue by his/her partner. I personally have friends that were abused by their boyfriends. Infact, one comes to mind. We were in university then, and in front of everyone, he would bang her head on his car door. The next day, they'll be holding hands and kissing in public. And I would wonder if she was emotionally okay? How could she still be with him after the physical torture he puts her through? This brings us to the blog post for today - intimate partner violence. What is it? How can you recognise it? If its happening to you what should you do? If you know someone that its happening to, how can you help?
Intimate partner violence is a very serious, common public health problem that encompasses :
It is usually perpetrated by a current or former intimate partner. An intimate partner is any person that you share a close, personal relationship with characterised by one or more of the following :
The relationship does not need to have all the dimensions listed above. An example of an intimate partner could be boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, dating partner, sexual partner whether former or current.
As stated ealier, intimate partner violence is broadly classified into 4 main types but today I'll be talking on just physical violence.
Physical violence includes but is not limited to scratching, pushing, shoving, throwing, grabbing, biting, choking, stalking, hair pulling, slapping. So if your intimate partner is doing the above to you then you are being physically abused. Irrespective of whether he begs you afterwards or buys expensive gifts or promises not to do it again.
You need to address it, take steps to stop it and/or leave the relationship. Or you just may end up dead. I'm sure the beautiful Karabo who died a few days ago would have sworn that her boyfriend could'nt kill her but he did.
Please join me tomorrow when I talk about practical steps you can take if you are being physically abused. Or how you can help those you know.
Till my next post, please protect yourself, even if from an intimate partner. Keep yourself safe emotionally and physically, and stay healthy-pink.
Dr. Anire Oduko.
Reference.
Centre for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) (2015)
https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/definitions.html
Image: karabo Makoena (Courtesy Youtube)
Shocking! you may say but that's not the first time we've heard such stories. Something like that made the headlines in Nigeria a few years ago - the banker whose husband stabbed her so many times that her organs were visible. He was later sentenced to death by hanging. Also there's that popular story of the South-African olympic Medalist who shot his girlfriend dead and claimed he thought it was an intruder.Thats in the news, someone we may not know physically. However, this phenomenon is actually so common that almost everyone may know a lady (or man, though this is far less common) who has been beaten black and blue by his/her partner. I personally have friends that were abused by their boyfriends. Infact, one comes to mind. We were in university then, and in front of everyone, he would bang her head on his car door. The next day, they'll be holding hands and kissing in public. And I would wonder if she was emotionally okay? How could she still be with him after the physical torture he puts her through? This brings us to the blog post for today - intimate partner violence. What is it? How can you recognise it? If its happening to you what should you do? If you know someone that its happening to, how can you help?
Intimate partner violence is a very serious, common public health problem that encompasses :
- Physical violence
- Sexual violence
- Stalking
- Psychological aggression
It is usually perpetrated by a current or former intimate partner. An intimate partner is any person that you share a close, personal relationship with characterised by one or more of the following :
- Emotional Connectedness
- Regular contact
- Ongoing physical contact and/or sexual behaviour
- Identity as a couple
- Familiarity and knowledge about each other's lives.
The relationship does not need to have all the dimensions listed above. An example of an intimate partner could be boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, dating partner, sexual partner whether former or current.
As stated ealier, intimate partner violence is broadly classified into 4 main types but today I'll be talking on just physical violence.
Physical violence includes but is not limited to scratching, pushing, shoving, throwing, grabbing, biting, choking, stalking, hair pulling, slapping. So if your intimate partner is doing the above to you then you are being physically abused. Irrespective of whether he begs you afterwards or buys expensive gifts or promises not to do it again.
You need to address it, take steps to stop it and/or leave the relationship. Or you just may end up dead. I'm sure the beautiful Karabo who died a few days ago would have sworn that her boyfriend could'nt kill her but he did.
Please join me tomorrow when I talk about practical steps you can take if you are being physically abused. Or how you can help those you know.
Till my next post, please protect yourself, even if from an intimate partner. Keep yourself safe emotionally and physically, and stay healthy-pink.
Dr. Anire Oduko.
Reference.
Centre for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) (2015)
https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/definitions.html
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